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Author has written 130 posts for disabledfamilies

Please help us sleep

Every parent knows how debilitating it is when you have a newborn who wakes you up multiple times every night. You find yourself begging the baby to give you just a bit more sleep. As the weeks wear on, you stumble around numb and incoherent. Now imagine doing that for more than 20 years. Our … Continue reading

From a sibling’s perspective

Deane is my brother. He is physically and developmentally disabled and he is about to lose most of the support services that help him live a healthy, engaged life. Why? Because he will soon age out of the school system. That’s right. When Deane and thousands of disabled young people like him reach the age … Continue reading

The clock is ticking

  I get it. It’s pretty easy to spend my time at the family cottage – seemingly endless days in the sunshine, great meals with friends and family, hours in the boat enjoying the fresh air. Deane and I are both at our happy place. Nothing to complain about. Amid all that pleasure, it’s the … Continue reading

“You’re an adult now …”

I couldn’t remember the address. Deane and I stopped so I could check my phone for where we were going. As I looked up, I noticed we had stopped beside three very large, very tough looking guys who were standing in front of a male strip club. I decided to walk and dial. We walked … Continue reading

Growing up by appointment

“You are doing really well.” The words hung in the room. I wasn’t sure how to respond. It was a rather unexpected comment as the doctor was getting up to leave. It was the end of a three hour clinic visit – my son’s last clinic visit at the pediatric rehab hospital where he’s been … Continue reading

Dreaming of a dog

Deane loves dogs. He reaches over the edge of his wheelchair tray to pet any dog that walks by. He calls out to sit on the floor to try to snuggle up beside them. Years ago he became inconsolably upset after reading a Curious George book in which the monkey gets a dog. He wanted … Continue reading

Saying thanks

People don’t say “Thank you” enough. I don’t say thank you enough. Stopping to acknowledge something someone has done for you makes the world a kinder and better place, but in the face-in-a-screen, rush-around society we live in, we seem to have lost this. So I want to take this time to say a huge … Continue reading

Stranded on a desert island

“If you could do anything tomorrow, what would you do?” “Skiing,” said the mechanical voice of my son’s voice output program. “If you won the lottery, what would you buy?” Deane pressed “dog.” “If you were stranded on a desert island, what would you take?” “A guitar and drum. A TV (to watch Raptors’ games). … Continue reading

Looking into the future

It isn’t a conscious thing. It’s just become a habit, a form of protection against disappointment. Walking by displays for service agencies, the first thing I do is scan the pictures for people with walkers or wheelchairs. It is surprising how seldom the displays meet my criteria. I recently attended a forum put on by … Continue reading

Riding alone

It is very strange to be sitting here at 3:30. For 14 ½ years, 3:30 has been time to drop what I was doing and meet the school bus. Since my son was in preschool, he has taken a school-sanctioned bus twice a day and my day has been regulated by that bus. The arrival … Continue reading